I hope God loves me

This day will not go down as a good one in my history. My stinking paycheque is still not bloodyhell banked in yet, and for the first time in my whole goddamn life... I crapped useless shit for my finals. Seriously, I've been through so much of pressure-filled moments prior to having exams before this, but today is THE shit. Didn't study and didn't bother to study. So I really have to pray I don't fail. Or I'll have to call up Mr. Balbeer and seduce him into giving me good grades. I might actually contemplate on this option. Maybe it's not an option after all. It's all that I've got left. I've slept with a bai fella before... So what's gonna be difficult about this eh? I should come up with a list on ways to sleep with lecturers to get good grades. Stay tuned...

I wanted to leave the god forsaken place so badly that I'm going down in hell before I'm done. Not to mention the shitty coursework grades. Argh... It's killing me to think about what I'm gonna do if I fail. This is the first time I've ever really felt that I'm gonna fail. Mark my words, IT SUCKS. I think I'm gonna cry myself until I'm dry and then curl up and die. Note: Please wear pink to my funeral. I love pink and I'll let you know my vengeful soul won't mind. Black is so predictable at funerals.

Enough with the shittiness and paranoia... What's done is done. I gotta suck it up slowly.

On a happier note, today's Danny's birthday. The boy's finally grown up. We got him a Body Shop Men's gift set. Actually I bought the stuff. Didn't know the fella had a wishlist. This item wasn't on it. Don't read his blog 'cause I can't read Chinese anyway.

After the shitty exams, we went to Pizzeria Bella Italia at SS2. Kinda okay place. I ordered a complimentary salad, instead of the mushroom soup. Tasted Abby's. She found it salty but I liked it. But since it's hers so I only had two scoops. Kedekut punya perempuan...

My spaghetti. Forgot its name but it's originally written as fettucine on the menu. Just prefer spaghetti so got 'em to change it. It's got dory fish and all in it.

The salmon pizza we shared. Tastes okay-lah. Maybe I was too stuffed with food, I could still feel the cheese clogging my throat hours after eating just two slices. Sake San still wins hands down. No doubt about it.

Birthday boy ruining the pretty rose that the Body Shop lady made on the wrapper.

Male camwhore alert! (Nice pressie right? Sure la... Ashley chose ma)

Groupie!! Sui Hwa's missing 'cause she had to take this pic, so not a complete group pic-lar

If you thought my look was interesting (if you ever)... I'll share a secret. I got influenced by Jess from The Veronicas. She was in a similar outfit in the video for 'When It All Falls Apart'. Abby hates my black nails. I think I'm a punk wannabe. Gosh... Am I really?

Went to Midvalley (again!) to jalan-jalan with Danny. He wanted to get some Christmas gifts, and I ended up spending money I don't have yet on a Topman bag. Yeah... TopMAN. Oh... I got this year's first Christmas gift. It's so cute. Wish I could use it but too bad I can't. So who's feeling lucky?


Day said...

Failing a class shouldn't force you into darker alleys. Contemplate on why you didn't give a shit.
I've failed many times over and I had to take a break over last year to refigure my objectives.
I came back and and crap, I failed again.
I think it comes to being true to yourself than anybody else. If you are genuinely happy then the ones close to you will be as well.
I'm sorry I can just relate to what you're going through which is why I'm typing up all this mess...

Ashley Liew said...

It's just how everyone feels when they realized they've messed up. I guess coming to the end of the line makes you so tired and fed up of the journey. But I've done well all along. I'm no quitter. Just hate myself for performing so badly right before finishing. Don't wanna fail in any way. Btw, thanks for leaving a message. Wish you had more info bout urself tho ;)