All great things must come to an end

We watch in awe as 2008 slowly takes its final steps and bids us adieu. The curtains are drawn to close but we might just be lucky enough to steal one last look. A final glimpse of what have been done, or perhaps the shining light behind the curtain might inspire us to ponder upon what could have been done better. Personally, I would have a long list of the latter. No procrastination involved... I might have been guilty of that while younger but just some things I wished I had handled better and bad behaviours which might be better not displayed.

This year proved to be wonderful and memorable to me. So many things that I've accomplished and took charge over. I feel proud for being able to conquer some of the demons which have pestered me ever since my mind was still tender and foolish. Now I've grown slightly wiser. But still a fool in many ways.

I see the coming new year as an extension to my journey of gaining more knowledge. Fools are those who never seek to learn, and learning comes in many different ways everyday. I try to see the future in a positive light. Which is quite unlikely of me, for many would know me as a pessimist. For all the things which I failed to master this year, hopefully the challenges will come my way in the future and I'll try to take everything in stride. Perhaps I'll still whine and complain but that's only human. No mountains can be conquered without a pant or two. Even if one works out religiously at the gym without fail ;)

I'll need this positive spirit throughout the coming new year. I can definitely see it being in demand. More personal demons left undiscussed to fight upon and more stones to turn. Hopefully what I can find is more than just moss or dead frogs. I need a freaking magic wand to breeze through without running over any bumps. But then again, what's life without the occasional bruising? That's what our parents used to tell us whenever we fall down and scrape our knee as kids. Kids that don't trip over and fall don't grow up. I feel much less like a kid now and definitely the baggage on my shoulders are getting heavier. I know now I'm an adult. I didn't have this feeling last year.

So I'll keep my fingers crossed and remind myself to try harder. Maybe this time it'll all work out. Nothing seems too bad as long as there's another new year. Happy 2009!

Back in 2005

Look what I found!!

Omg this picture is so funny. I guess the reason why I looked through my old folders is because I went pass the front entrance of my faculty this afternoon and I found out it's no longer called 'Faculty of Arts & Science'. It's now known as 'Faculty of Creative Industries'. This picture was taken 3 years ago, when I was just 20 years old. Sigh... That sounds bloody far back in time. We were doing an ad campaign for women abuse awareness and I was sacrificed to be the model. Datin Abby did the makeup and everyone thought the bruise was real after they saw this shot. Hahahaha!! I remember it didn't look that realistic in real life. It was just purple, black and grey eyeshadow all mixed up and mashed all over my pretty face. I had it uploaded on my Friendster account back then and I had tons of strangers commenting on this photo. Some said the makeup was very cool and some were just plain curious to find out whether or not I was hit in my face. Such powerful impact it made. But for the life of me, I can't remember if we scored high for this assignment. We probably did. We hit it high most of the time ;p

Oh how I miss study life. I was so young back then. And my body never ached the way it does now even if I never had a wink of sleep for a whole day. Not forgetting I never had to give a damn about splatting my face with makeup. Nowadays I can barely go out without at least touching up my eyebags. Speaking of which, I'd better get my ass to bed now or else I'll look like a zombie tomorrow. Nites!

Come on big girl

Who cares about little bitches that talk too much?

Is this what they call God's sign?

Saw a motherfucking moody and pissy pregnant woman on the LRT today. Made me wonder if I looked like her during all the times I had my scowled bitchface on. Also saw this on my Gmail "Quote of the Day":

"Change before you have to."
- Jack Welch -

Is it abnormal for me to feel kind of spooked out by what's happening?

Me against the world

I hate my family : My family hates me

I won't be complete without Mr. Bun : He doesn't me interrupting his life

I'm doing well in my job : There are no real friends

I'm living my life : My world is empty

I'm embedded with deep anger towards the world : I have no hope of redeeming myself

I want to be kind and friendly : They think I'm fake

I want to be true to myself : They think I'm not trying hard enough

Let's say if your truly wants to give up on life altogether. Is it a crime? Punishable by law? I've read in the papers today that a girl was prosecuted for an attempt at suicide. I guess I'll have to keep silent if ever I decide to take my own life. Speaking of which... I'm thhhhiiiiissssss (hand showing thumb and index finger getting real close) near to having a nervous breakdown. Don't ask me why. Hopeless people have no answers. I don't intend to search for an answer anymore. I just wanna quit to stop this overbearing pain. I'm tired of being a pain in the ass but I can't stop hurting people around me.





The liberty of writing a post with all caps and has a high amount of vulgarities isn't working to sedate my anger at all. Not one bit. I need to lay down. Fucking headache is kicking in.


Ooh la la... Man I'd like to fuck. I'd absofuckingly not hesitate to rip off his clothes and jump on him if we'd ever have a chance encounter. So what if Kenny Sia saw Jay Chou's pubes in a spilt second? This picture here is what we call REAL pubes.

Hey Dan Dan... Do me a favour will ya? Just pull down those pants an inch or two lower. I'd die in ecstasy. Like how those girls did when they saw Prince Will's willie. By the way, I've not seen that one. I like Prince Harry more since them both have grown up.

I'd better pay a visit to Daniel's sushi place whenever I go to Hong Kong... Eat sushi off his killer bod. Yum!!

Boobies galore

Rihanna is one hot chick, and she definitely looks smokin' in lingerie. That's one sight that oughta get them boys going crazee. But it seems like she's dressed in lingerie in almost every other music video she puts out nowadays. Running out of fresh ideas in the wardrobe department, no? Or would everyone still prefer her running around with her girls on display? Just asking...

My first hangover

I was in Kiasuland two weeks back for work. The trip wasn't meant for me to go but due to some circumstances, I was glad the opportunity was given to me to take up the task. Boy, was I glad when I was told I did well at the end of the trip!!! Gotta get my butt moving to do up the claims now :p

First sight upon crossing the border and Customs... Singapore Flyer. Must take a ride one day. Maybe after the new Genting place opens. The view would look better by then.

Since I'm travelling for work, of course I'd be staying at our own hotels if we have any in town. We do have one cosy boutique-style hotel at Tanjong Pagar. This is how the lobby looks like. It had air-conditioners working on full blast. Brrrrrr...

First room that I checked in. Didn't sleep in here though. You'll know why shortly. Rooms aren't too bad. Not too bad at all. Quite big by Singaporean standards. You know how limited their property spaces are.

All the shophouses in this area look like this. Very old school colonial buildings. There are lots of small bridal houses and you'll never miss the amount of drinking holes all around this place. But I'm told the government is actually going to have these outlets all closed by next year so it's gonna get more businessmen-friendly, as opposed to, you know, sleazy old men kind of friendly. And why couldn't I sleep in the first room? It's facing this part of the street and the bass noise was just killing me. It wasn't very bad, I just couldn't handle the slightest amount of noise before I go to bed.

My hotel is also very near to this kickass food court called Maxwell. There's a stall which sells porridge which is to-die-for. I've never had porridge so good back in KL. But then again it's totally different from the good porky spare parts porridge we have here in Pudu. The picture above is of the raw fish slices served with the porridge, and the picture doesn't do the dish any justice. Wish I had a better camera though. I've always been prejudiced against Singaporean food. They're so expensive and taste blah! But from this trip I've discovered some pretty interesting and good makan places. There's also a nice xiao long bao place near the hotel. Which name I totally forgot. Nevertheless, one plate of char siew rice I had somewhere near some offices tasted like plastic. Bleurgh!!

First stop after check-in: Suntec City Mall. Funny banner above was the first interesting thing I've seen. It was at the Watson's outlet in this mall that I discovered freaking cheap facial masks. How come we don't get such kickass promotions here? I literally spent my fortune on masks on this trip.

They've got floating Christmas trees at Suntec!

Then it was off to Vivo City with Mee Fung! That place is huuuuuuuuuuugggggeeeee...

... and had such pretty lights!

I saw this pair of shoes and I wanted them so badly. They're so FIERCEEEEEEEEEE. But freaking expensive ;(

Far beyond you'll see the Genting casino thingy construction site. There's an awful lot of cranes at that place... To a point it looked like a city of cranes.

On the second night I had a taste of my first Singaporean night out. Here's me with my colleague Suan on my right and Cecilia from Regent on my left. Such lovely ladies. We're here at the entrance of Canton at Clark Quay, where you can find Chinagirls in bikini tops, short shorts and fishnet stockings working up the pole.

Well apart from sexy girls they had live performers as well. I was totally conned to rush to the stage to see if the girl was Elva Hsiao. Nearly twisted my ankle okay?? Babi punya Thomas.

Said hi to the Terracota Warrior...

... and the lonely kwailou sitting on a wheelchair. This place is called CLINIC and it was decked with all sorts of stuff you'd find in a clinic and hospital. They even served drinks in hospital drips. So farnee! I couldn't resist taking a picture.

Me and hot mama at a Latin place at St. James. There were couples salsa-ing the night away and they had some pretty slick moves. Singaporeans really do go out and purely just have fun by themselves. What I really like about the nightlife there is that the night spots were all smoke free, totally unlike what we have here.

And one picture of the girls with the guy. Meet Thomas, obviously the lucky guy sandwiched in the middle. Nice guy, but still a babi. Elva Hsiao my ass lah! Can't believe I fell for that lame trick. At this point we were kong-ed out already. I had my first hangover at 23 and it felt like death. At least that's how I think death would feel like. Death's probably a million times worse but hey, I didn't feel good at all. Not one bit. To think that I had to still make my media rounds the very next morning. I was puking the whole morning and couldn't even stomach in water. I'll just safely stick back to being a responsible drinker. No more hangovers for me.

On my final night I went to Orchard Road with Mee Fung. I was saying on Facebook that I'm seeing Christmas lights in Singapore for the first time ever but I recall now that I've actually seen them at least twice before. And this year's sucked. To the max. And you can't say it's better than KL 'cause we've never had anything here like Orchard Road before. So it's not even fair to make comparisons like that.

Oh land of Kiasu... I shall be back for more. I'm already missing the Watson's, This Fashion outlets and Far East Plaza. 'Cause these are all places which I can currently afford to shop at. And I must revenge by going clubbing at Clark Quay again and then go eat late night porridge with chili crab. I was puking so hard during my night out I couldn't even taste it. I shall be back!

Quit your hypocritical preach

Allow me to pour out some honesty and put this in record. Your BRAND sucks!! I'm still left with the cleaning up work following the aftermath. But that's alright. I'm gonna show the world who's the great bitch and who's not.

I'm not gonna diss you on the Internet, 'cause my momma taught me better than that
I'm a survivor
I'm not gonna give up
I'm not gonna stop
I'm gonna work harder
'Cause I'm a survivor

Back to being the lost little girl

"When you are stretched, it helps you grow. You just have to be careful of not snapping. When you're stretched, you'll feel the pain. And when you feel the pain, you will grow".

Quote: My Lady Boss

Where was I?

Journey through a Nikon D2X lens... and then some

When you start asking why some people spend tens of thousands dollars on a friggin' camera... You should start looking at their pictures to know the answer. Below pictures are graciously (or not?) donated by Weng from Weng Studio.

Going our separate ways. A very unromantical and non-makeup candid shot captured without both of us knowing.

Meanwhile... Another couple is getting the mood on! Nah... It was all about the perfect timing and perfect angle. I swear on my momma's life this wasn't a staged photo op or photoshopped!

Later that day, I was caught red-handed in an intimate moment with some other guy when Mr. Bun wasn't around. Please don't mind it was the guy from the above picture. There weren't too many male homosapiens around when we were up the hills. Not that I was caught in the moment by choice anyway. We were all forced to be test shot models in every other shot, except the photographer though.

Test shot of 'Meetings in the Nature'

Erm... Chaos at the park?

Aaawwww... Don't they look so happy chilling out at the cabana? Test shot models are so important that even the real models had to try to hide behind the bushes

By now you would be thinking we're clowning during working hours. But Imma tell you we work hard like cowboys. Yeehaw!!

Some of us worked so hard to a point where we were like kulis.

Woah... Now that's a pro!

Disclaimer: The following pictures are shot with cellphone cameras

Now you see what sort of genius thoughts and intelligence that goes behind the scene of a photoshoot project. Beautiful pictures don't just get captured without proper planning and much work. Neither would you have guessed who the real person looks like in pictures which feature just certain body parts. It was plain hard work + much sweat and tears trying to take new pictures for Tioman, Langkawi and the hills. But I'm glad we came through in the end and not only we've got kickass new pictures in the photo library now, we managed to work our asses off and still love each other at the end of the day.

Altogether now, AAAAWWWWWWWWWWWWW...

I'm a lean mean stressed up machine

Bet the whole world is having Obama-talk right now. Why the hell not? He broke a stereotype which still lives up till this day and got elected as USA's first black president. Kudos to that! Don't let the focus and scrutiny fool you though. Obama's not black. He's half white, half black. Representing both worlds fairly, we hope. But it hasn't really stuck me just how significant this election is. I do know it's the passing of the terrible past 8 years and the Americans now have a black president finally, but I don't really think it's any of my business... yet anyways. Gotta wait until we see if the new president is able to lift up America's economy and hopefully the rest of the world will rise up followingly. Such a pitiful thing that we're so relient on one single nation for our economy's survival btw.

These few days has been really pressing and stressed up, but I've learned a lot at the same time. I've seen some really ugly side of people who have hidden agendas. How they would have the heart to say negative words to influence innocent minds baffles me. It's like how the drug industry tells you that drinking milk is good for you and your kids. The society's been brainwashed to think that human beings can actually absord the nutrients in cow's milk. But in fact we can't. Sometimes I wonder how we can cut the crap and have everyone focused on what's important in life. But who knows... Maybe scandals and backstabbing mean a lot to these rodents. Notice how I've not slammed gossiping? Gossiping isn't really harmful I think. It's just chatter that comes and goes. Things go bad when backstabbing comes into play. Sometimes gossips keep things fun and lively. Might bring people closer as well.

Oh did I mention time flies by like a freaking annoying mosquito you're trying to smack but escapes anyway? I see many people, including yours truly trying hard to grasp tight on time but we end up catching up like mad. It's like being away from the gym for 6 months and suddenly you're trying to run for 20 minutes on the treadmill. You're gonna be gasping for breath and feeling nauseaus after not even halfway near 20 minutes.

I had a sudden urge to hop on an airplane last night. I didn't care where it would take me. I just needed to be away. Where can I go from here?

Dwell on the past we shall not

Thanks debbie for the comparison with Master Yoda. Apparently she thinks I'm wise and small like that green little fella.

Mr. Bun's birthday was in the weekend and I totally screwed up the celebrations. First was the duit kopi for them you-know-whos. Apparently we weren't supposed to turn into that road from the roundabout. WTF?! Why make roads then?? Then dinner was disastrous 'caused I spilled them dishes. Don't ask me how. It was purely unintentional. I was totally trying to do something else and left my brain at the stove. In the end, we had to have steamed chicken without my secret special sauce. Oh and the last minute roasted duck that my dad tapao-ed and soup. Better than nothing, I think.

I'm sooooooooooooooooo not looking forward to work tomorrow. I skipped Monday blues and I'm not ready for a long meeting tomorrow morning after unsuccessfully chasing my blues away today.

Debbie, think about that Kuching trip I told you about last night okay? Let's plan to make it happen somehow. I need an E.S.C.A.P.E.

Lost in time

I'm not the only one who's been confused throughout the day. Mr. Weatherman has squirrels building a nest up his pants and got all cuckooed up his ass too. The weather's been scorching hot but it's also raining cats and dogs. It has continued to rain again as I'm typing this entry. Not that I really mind the fucked up weather today since I've not planned to go out but it doesn't help with my emo state of mind. What are you emo-ing about, you may ask. Trust me, I have no idea. Anthony Bourdain is on the telly right now and I don't even have the mood to watch. And you should be told that I love Bourdain to bits. I wish to kidnap him and show him our lovely food in Malaysia. Such disgrace Chef Wan has done the last time Mr. Bourdian touched down on our land. Someone needs to drag Bourdain's ass to the best bak kut teh, asam laksa, curry mee and loads of other porky goodness. That's what good food is all about.

Tomorrow's gonna be a new working week and I'm having mixed emotions about going back into the office. Lately I've proved to some close friends that I love my job and significantly good at it. I'd really love to start spreading my wings and see how far I can go. It's been close to 2 years now since I've said "YES" to this position and I've seen some pretty slick tricks that I've learned. Looking back, I've taken a few steps away from the clueless fresh grad that I used to be but maybe it's still not enough. Which brings to a question: How much is enough? Heck, even Madonna and Guy being married for 8 years isn't long enough to avoid them from the ultimate ending of a Hollywood couple. So who can tell when it will be enough?

Should I start by asking myself what I want? I want to be successful. Forgive me if I can't be specific. I just can't be at this point. Everything's such a blur. I just realized last night that November's coming soon. Damn! Another year passing me by?? Even broccolis don't turn yellow this soon when they're kept in the fridge for months! But tell you what... Sometimes I do ask myself what if I miss out on the best things in life without even realizing it? Like when I hold on to something while something else more worthwhile passes me by. That will just show me just how bad my judgement skills are. I'm not even convinced that I have any judgement skills or whatsoever.

What's gonna happen when time moves too fast? No one can really tell eh? I'd reckon so. Perhaps I should suck it up and move forward with time. Would never get left behind if I moved in pace with time. It's such a tricky little bitch. Or bastard. Depends on however way you wanna look at it. It's asexual anyway. I'm gonna end this with an emo picture of myself. Such work of art, if you ask me.

Beginning to a journey of love

I must be such a bimbo for thinking I couldn't post up pictures for our media launch just because my thumb drive was formatted. I forgot the pictures would still be in my memory card -.-" Anyhoo... Bimbo-ness aside, 14 October 2008 will forever be etched as an unforgetable evening as we brought the sun to shine during the day and rawked the night away. The media turnout was fantastic and everyone had a great time. That's what matters most in the end :)

Imagine being whisked away in one of these beautiful classic cars. That's exactly the only thing I could do... Just imagine! Only media friends were chauffeured up to the hills in these babies and boy do I envy them!

Anyone who haven't registered yet? Don't wait any longer... Log on to NOW!!

First stop of the day: Being transferred to the tranquil Japanese Village, where everyone gets to learn about the Japanese tea ceremony and what significant role it plays in Japanese wedding custom. They get to learn about all sorts of wedding customs from all over the world throughout the day. And yes, the person in yellow at the corner is indeed Datin Abby!

A full Japanese tea ceremony would last up to 4 hours, but everyone was just introduced to a super short version of 20 minutes. But that doesn't stop anyone from being spoilt with a pampering massage session. Look at our Datin dozing off enjoying herself.

Paying close attention to the chef's instructions on how to decorate their very own wedding cake.

Doesn't the setup look amazing and dreamy?

We didn't win anything and it's not like it's any of our business but saja-saja wanna sibuk take pictures. Winner's the cute guy in black.

Now that the official launch has come and gone, it's also officially going to be a long journey for us and everyone else before one winning couple will be chosen to win a fully sponsored designer beach wedding at Berjaya Langkawi Beach & Spa Resort. I'd be tempted to take part if I wasn't automatically defaulted...

A dream too many

I need someone to tell me what my dreams mean. Could there be a rational explanation behind the thoughts that run through my head while I'm in slumber? Or could they be just silent fears at the back of my head? Can someone tell me what's going on before he appears in my dreams again? They're no nightmares, but nevertheless they rub off a creepy effect on me everytime. They hit me with a high dose of melancholy and leave me thinking there might be some danger lurking at some corner. I hate waking up in the morning thinking about unhappy thoughts and being reminded of the pain that I've gone through. How can I not warp myself in this pain?

Somebody please save me.

When the nerves start kicking in

The vintage cars are lined up in front of the building as I'm typing this. Decorations are going up in a crazy pace and I'm praying hard nothing else goes wrong. It's the biggest grounds event that we've attempted yet and it must go right!! And oh!!! Can it not rain up at the hills tomorrow? We just need ONE dry day. Please??

Tunes that's making me smile lately

Come On Get Higher - Matt Nathanson

I'm Yours - Jason Mraz

Make It Mine - Jason Mraz

Shake It - Metro Station

Leavin' - Jesse McCartney

I'm beginning to feel fear

Let me share a real life experience. An experience that leaves me fearing for security even when I'm within the four walls of my own home and one that leaves me severely unimpressed with the level of efficiency as displayed by our police force. I didn't exactly walk into my boyfriend jerking off like how the girl did in this ad. Or at least the guy in the ad wasn't really jerking off at all. I'm not sure if it's me, but I seem to have this insane ability to attract ta fei kei sex maniacs wherever I go. And I am talking serious. It may sound funny, but I'm starting to fear my own safety after what just went down. My head is already throbbing in pain from all the unnecessary tension and fear I'm dealing with right now.

I was sitting in front of my computer about an hour ago and for those who don't know, my computer table is in the living room and allows the seater to just turn his/her head to the right and look at the street outside. The house right opposite my home has a lamp post to its left and there was a man standing there. He seemed like he was waiting for someone coming out from that house so I ignored him the first time. What brought me to even notice him in the first place was that he deliberately coughed loudly so that I would turn my head and look at him. A couple of minutes later, I turned around again and realized he had been pleasuring himself and wanted to give me a free show. I called my mom and that's when he darted away.

My mom immediately opened the doors and tried to give chase with a long wooden stick. But she didn't run away alone into the night like that lah! She was telling the Indian family who was living two doors away from my home. That got the aunties and uncles into a heated discussion for a while. Then my mom tried to drive around for a while to look for suspicious freaks, but alas, to no avail.

I locked myself at home while my mom played The Dark Knight and I called 999. The person on the line found it amusing that I called in to report such an indecency and sniggered. He told me to call the operator and ask for the nearest police station's telephone number and he can't help. Fine. So I called the Seri Kembangan police station. So this constabel who answered my call layan-ed me for 30 seconds and when I asked if they could send a patrol car over, he didn't answer my question. He told me that he will report the case. No 'Yes' or 'No' was given. How appaling is the level of security given by our so-called protectors to the rakyat? Perhaps I'm overreacting. Perhaps I shouldn't be too surprised to receive such response in the first place.

Barely a minute after the call ended, he returned my call and told me that my housing area falls under Kajang's authority. This is such a trivial fact because my housing area is no where near to Kajang than it is to Seri Kembangan. Fine. I called the Kajang police station and made the same report. At least this Kajang officer bothered to ask my address and if I still see the maniac around. I told him that the maniac had already ran away. He did mention that they'll send someone over but I've yet to see a patrol car until now. It's been more than an hour since I placed a call to the police station. The maniac is surely hiding somewhere safe and far by now.

So this leaves us to one question: Are we left to protect ourselves in fear and no help can come for rescue? It must be such a pleasure to see our tax money go down the drain along with the smelly garbage which clogs it. I don't know what to do. The world is so fearful right now I could go crazy just thinking about what could happen in worst times. Perhaps my story could make Kamunting detainees feel better about themselves. At least they're much safer in there. No rapists, snatch thieves and burglars after their asses everyday.

Something to do while I wait

1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves a comment, letting them know they got tagged and to ask them to play and read your blog

Starting time : 1250 GMT

Name : Ashley Liew

Sisters : Nil

Brothers : Three

Shoe size : 5 or 6 (Typical Malaysian size)

Height : 155cm?

Where do you live : Seri Kembangan, Selangor, Malaysia

Have you ever been on a plane : Yes

Swam in the ocean : More like frolicked, not exactly swimming

Fallen asleep at school : Definitely

Broken someone’s heart : Maybe

Fell off your chair : Can't recall any of this sort of incident

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : Yes, but not literally sat up waiting. The handphone was beside my pillow

Saved e-mails : Yes

What is your room like : Small, full of my hair, dusty but neat

What’s right beside you : I'm stuck between the TV and praying cabinet

What is the last thing you ate : Papaya

Ever had Chicken pox : Yes, back when I was in kindergarden

Sore throat : Not right now

Stitches : No stitches, but I've got scars everywhere

Broken nose : No

Do you Believe in love at first sight : Maybe

Like picnics : Not in Malaysia. Who are you kidding? With our kind of weather?

Who was the last person you danced with : Mr. Bun

Last thing made you smile : Love Me 'Do! getting more response

You last yelled at : The aunty who lives behind my house

Kissed anyone : Mr. Bun

Get sick : Not right now

Talk to an ex : For what?

Miss someone : Yes. Dear, I'm so sorry for being such a spoiled brat

Who do you really hate: The aunty who lives behind my house

Do you like your hand-writing : Sometimes

Are your toe nails painted : Not right now. They were yesterday though

Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in : Hugh Jackman's

What color shirt are you wearing now : White

Are you a friendly person : Sometimes. Depends on my mood

Do you have any pets : Never

Do you sleep with the TV on : Sometimes

What are you doing right now : Waiting for Kuan Yee

Can you handle the truth : Yes

Are you closer to your mother or father : Mom

Do you eat healthy : I try hard to

Do you still have pictures of you & your ex : For what?

If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to : Mr. Bun

Are you loud or quiet most of the time : Depends on the day

Are you confident : Sometimes

5 things I was doing 10 years ago
1) Struggling to learn Mandarin from new Chinese friends
2) Acting cool while dressing up as a lala
3) Putting boyband posters all over my bedroom wall
4) Singing along to Britney Spears on top of my lungs
5) Wishing to marry Justin Timberlake

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire
1) Buy myself and my loved ones everything
2) Build trust funds for myself and loved ones
3) Go travel with Mr. Bun
4) Donate to the needy
5) Invest

5 of my bad habits
1) Lazy
2) Always putting on a bitchface
3) Pessimistic
4) Take things for granted
5) Act like everyone owes me in some sort of way

5 places I have been living in
1) Wangsa Maju
2) Seri Petaling
3) Seri Kembangan
4) Petaling Jaya
5) Sungai Besi

5 people I tag
No one, actually

Spreading the love

The miracle child is born. Show some love at Make us proud mommas!


I'm stuck alone at home all day and feeling hungry all the time. I can't stop feeling stressed even though I'm out of the office for almost a week. Wait a minute, is that a sign of workaholicism? Or I'm just bored out of my skull? Anyway, I also can't get over the fact that I'll be turning older in just a few more days and I'm not ready for that. Not that I'm Madonna and the spotlight's gonna be on how much I've aged but every girl deserves to feel paranoid about how old she gets at each birthday. I'm just channelling my inner drama queen rightfully. Who wouldn't worry about wrinkles and the force of gravity as time goes? I would. Which explains perfectly why I'm freaking out as the clocks ticks away. Not to mention there's nothing really interesting on tv to keep me fully occupied. I did my own laundry today but I pretty much lazed around the whole day, plonked lazily on the red sofa with white tiger print bolsters in my living room. My home sounds so disco. Trust me, its nothing like that. Oh when can I ever stop whining and get my lazy ass to the gym or yoga class? I know! When I learn to drive. Which is not happening too soon. But I'll try my best to make that happen. Then I can get some yoga action going on. And also I won't feel so goddamn lethargic and can keep my own mouth shut.

Fuck my near to non-existent knowledge of webpage HTML. Tried to jazz up my blog template but my skills are fucking limited that I'm gonna throw up all over this site. You're all gonna smell the scrambled eggs that I just had. Weird thing is, it's dinner time here and not breakfast. I know, I have weird cravings sometimes.

There you go. I got that off my chest. Nothing much of what I typed made sense but I don't care. Just needed to blow off some steam.

Closing the door

For those few years that we weren't studying together, I did my best to keep in touch and keep our friendship. But more often than not, I get ignored. Well, it happened with one or two friends anyway. Till this day I wonder if I'm wrong to turn a deaf ear to her stories. Does this make me a cold-hearted beast that my friends would fear if they knew? I have my reservations when she tells me stories of how pitiful her life is. But who could blame me for not believing when she confesses of having leukemia? Confessions which were made casually over a chat on MSN. If it were that serious she could've gave me a ring. I see her still happily posting pictures on Friendster and chatting away on MSN, telling me more stories of her failed relationships, enquiring about my relationship, asking me out for tea and more. What's more baffling is that she supposedly has only a short while more to live, (or so she tells me, but not specifically how much longer) but still has a job. No offence but I wouldn't buy the story that a leukemia patient at a terminal stage would have the ability to drive to work and sit in the office working all day. Now I understand why she told me stories of her being pregnant and went for an abortion when we were teenagers, then telling me later that she wasn't pregnant after all. Maybe she just wanted attention. Just like how she wants it now. She probably needs help. But I don't think I'm able to give it. Forgive me. I need a closure and you're not allowed into my life anymore.

Merdeka spirit thrown down the drain

Where's the level of maturity among our society if we let a fucktard with his foul mouth roam freely on the streets? If he dares to call the main pump of this country's economy as immigrants who don't deserve to belong here, he should be castrated and put silent with his dick stuffed in his piehole. Police reports are already lodged and he still has the balls to step out and speak like a hero owing no apologies, as if there's no one deserving of it.
I am seething mad. I feel like the man in the mask. Think V for Vendetta. If only I had that kind of courage to set things right and show those fucks who's the real boss. We elected you to power, it doesn't mean you can use it against us. Even slicing his tongue in public would not matter now. It's too late to apologize.
I have my able limbs, but I am the minority. I can't go protesting alone on the streets. It's only so typical that people keep silent at things that make them so angry and care only about moving on. Here's me sitting in front of my computer thinking of how it would all be if we skipped this episode. But my insides are boiling. I can only hope for a change so that my future generations don't have to bear with all these crap. I can only hope for a day when my children can call themselves Malaysians without any doubt. No more racial introductions. Just Malaysian. Alas! Here is a perfect example of how we can get rid of such racial hatred but we are not doing anything good to save the day. We are just letting him roam free with his words spilling over to cause more hurt.
Hello. My name is Ashley and I have yellow skin. But I do not know who I really am. Malaysian? You tell me. But only if you can tell yourself that too.

As things heat up

Introduce a little anarchy. Upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I'm an agent of chaos. Oh and you know the thing about chaos, it's fair.
The Joker, Batman: The Dark Knight 2008
May the best man wins tomorrow. We rakyat truly deserve a little bit more of fairness around here. I personally wouldn't mind a teeny weeny bit of chaos in return of justice. Not that the candidates necessarily bring justice immediately, but it goes to show that if an upset happens, we're just trying to show how upset we really are. Let's call it our cry for help.

You know you're old when...

A father tells his son to thank you like this:
Dad looking at young son: Se**, say thank you, aunty.

*sound of my heart breaking into a million pieces*
Which effing part of my face looks AUNTY ??? This is what I'd like to call poor parenting. It's like teaching your kid that a horse is in fact a donkey. I can't deal with this. How can anyone call such a young, hot, fabulous, fashionable, trendy, chic, pretty and kind young lady an AUNTY?? I need to dig a hole and just die. Or better yet, throw that dad into the hole and just leave 'em there to die from drowning in a big puddle of rain water. That'll teach ya not to simply call me an aunty.
*storms off to buy a shovel*


Once in a while we all get to dress up and have a little fun. Once in a while we are invited to be at a happening party with gorgeous a theme. That sounds very much like a party I'd like to be at. Earlier this week I was invited to the OK! Celeb Fest 2008 at Zouk. Well of course I wasn't invited alone, but anyhoo I got VIP passes. That doesn't come very often. The theme of the party was 'Magnificent Masquerade', and we were all like a bunch of happy nerds going around shopping for pretty masks before the party. We wouldn't do so under normal circumstances, but the invite said that we'd be penalized by the fashion police if we were caught without any mask on. So of course we had to shop for some may-jah masks. But unfortunately the party didn't turn out to be quite like what we had expected. Sad. But that happens sometimes to parties that could've been such a blast... For everyone in the venue.

Let's start from the beginning. We were waiting for each other to arrive in front of Zouk and spotted some local celebs arriving by foot. And a little while later, some of them started arriving in their rented Benzes. That really brought the lolz. Never thought our homegrown celebs needed that kinda attention and drama. But I guess we all do, don't we? Truthfully I have nothing much to say about the event 'cause we didn't manage to have a lot of fun 'cause most of the group left even before halfway. Even yours truly didn't stay on till the end. I had to leave after they announced the so-called Best Dressed. She was a disaster.

Me with my mask n Mr. Bun with his. He could hardly breath in that thing :p

One of the performers of the night, and the only one I caught just because she was up on stage early. I didn't know her but her name was Honey Madu, if I got the name spelt right. Her voice was okay -- but she was too syok sendiri while on stage. Bask in the spotlight while you can, honey!

Emcees for the night - Serena C and Pietro from Mix FM

Here's JP accepting his award, which I don't remember the category.

Here's me with my lucky draw prize. Haha! I practically ran and jumped on stage when I heard my name called. Actually I wasn't even paying attention to the emcees talking but I just heard my name being called and knew I won something. And that something was a prize from Triumph. Yay for free bras and panties!! More on that later. My name got called in the first round, which means it's usually the smaller prizes and I hate that. That's happened twice! The first time at another party, my name was called first for the night and all I got was a whole range of Gatsby hair wax. Bummer. I ended up giving them all away 'cause I don't use those. But it beats not winning anything at all, I suppose :) I wonder who walked away with the grand prize at Celeb Fest. That lucky bastard/bitch is gonna loooooove soaking in that jacuzzi by the sea. Ask me in person if you wanna know what I mean.

So I claimed my prize at Parkson Pavilion yesterday. In my envelope, there was no voucher or anything. Just a letter from Triumph congratulating me for winning and of course the T&C. I was sure Triumph's trying to get rid of their old stock and decided to restrict me to a few ranges, 'cause they had a bunch of item codes written on the letter but to my lovely surprise, they were actually giving out their very latest range, the Eco Chic. It's so new that it's not even ready for viewing on Triumph Malaysia's website. So let's see... According to the tag on my bra, the Eco Chic range contains no farm drugs, no chemicals like aldehyde (tried to wiki this but couldn't understand a sentence) and no metals. I don't even know what's the support made of 'cause the salesgirl couldn't give me the information -.-" The range is also made from natural colouring substances to prevent allergies and to retain colouring from washing and natural cotton for comfort. I think that's cool. Now we ladies can be environmental friendly right to the inside. Here's a peek at the range...

I apologize for the visual torture. I'm no supermodel. Let's wait for the pro shots from Triumph okay?