Sexual Frustration

I Wanna Fuck You edited to become I Wanna Love You...

What has become to the world? It's Akon's fault.

Would I want a guy come up to me one day and say "Ashley, I fuck you so much"?

No. Unless you're Hugh Jackman. Or Jude Law. Or Nicolas Cage. Or Daniel Wu. Or... Okay, I better stop here before I type until the sun rises.

I'm so worried no one will ever be able to tell the difference between love and lust anymore. Myself included. Could there be real love existing anymore on the surface of earth? But then again, a relationship wouldn't work if there weren't a sprinkle of lust involved. I mean, if you like someone, sex is a definite factor, regardless if it was or wasn't the first thing on your mind. It's gonna come eventually. I dig fuckable guys. What is my definition of a yummy screw? Cute celebs. But unless I'm willing to forsake all my belongings here in Malaysia to fly over to America and become a groupie, then my dreams of sleeping with any of the guys I have dirty dreams about will never ever come true. So that leaves me lonely and sad at home every weekend night, while my peers are out fornicating at the hippest and most happening night scenes. I wish I had that kinda life. That kinda personality. But I just don't. I'm not a flirt. And that explains why I don't have guys lining up from my front door to Setapak waiting to date me. Will my inner frustrations drive me up the wall and one day succumb to the sluttism Paris Hilton has preached to the world? Nah...

When I complain of being not good enough, or feel insecure of my shortcomings, people tell me that I'm not as bad as I think. They tell me I'm still young, compliment me for looking pretty and admire my strength. But I say, fuck that. If I'm really that good, seriously, how come ugly bitches get confused over which guy they should date, and I'm locked up in my room daydreaming of my Valentine's date, without having a clear vision of his face, 'cause I don't have any in the first place?

Saw a teenage lesbo couple walking while holding hands today. I suddenly realized that I don't get it. I don't get them. I don't get lesbians. I mean, I get gays, but not lesbians. Maybe Deb can gimme a lecture about it but I doubt I'll ever be convinced. (Deb's a closet les, not a real one. Yet :p) Gays can definitely satisfy their sexual needs. After all, they're fucking with their dicks. But how do lesbos do it? People may say, "Use dildo lor". But what's the point? And it's scary 'cause I was gonna blog about this and dear Deb posted a video from 'The L Word' on her blog. Circles? If everytime also circle then will be boring right or not? I don't think I'm a homophobe. Sometimes it's not their fault. But I still think homosexualism is wrong. 'Cause sex is meant for men and women to procreate. If men started to fuck other men's assholes and women licking each other's pussies, then the human species would become extinct. They've started. We just don't know how far they'll go.

The real cause of this entry was dogs. Goddamn stray dogs. I don't hate animals, but I really can't stand this (huge) pack of stray dogs roaming in and around the resential area I live in. They're such a nuisance. Are the authorities waiting for the day a little kid gets attacked or mauled to death by these flea-infested dogs before taking action? Maybe so. It's always the case. Don't make me talk about how these stupid dogs howl in the middle of the night, pretending to be wolves. It's so dumb. Saw a pair of them fucking among the big group this morning on the way out to the LRT station. So not a nice sight early in the morning! That means there's gonna be more stray pups that will grow up to take over the elders' place. Can I just buy my own gun and shoot them all? I promise I'll try hard not to misuse it.


deb said...

ah my darling ashley, i shall one day garner the strength to lecture you about the love&life of a lesbian. like you said, you may not get it. but hey, at least you've heard it out you know. :)

popular to contrary believe, i'm no longer in the closet. i'm out. openly gay. haha! but with a boyfriend. to cover up the homosexuality. sorta like b3rnard ch4ndr4n. hahaha! jk.

it's not always only about the circles. circles are good. but it's not only about the circles. there are lots more spices/actions to it.

at the end of the day there's only one thought that popped into my mind after reading this post of yours: we need to get you a boyfriend asap. you need to be laid. period.

me love you long time, ash! *hugz*

Ashley Liew said...

Yes. It's been a while since I got some *wink wink*