A Little Too Late

Dear Brian,

It's been a while since I last talked about you. I still remember how I used to write your nickname across the palm of my left hand during my high school days. FYI, we don't really call it 'high school' here in Malaysia. It's secondary school. As if we were not good enough to be first class citizens... And how could I ever forget those posters and stickers with your pretty little face, which I used to collect back in the day? I think I lost the stickers along with the cheap wallet that I dropped while riding pillion on my dad's bike when I was 13, and I've since outgrowned the posters. I got rid of them. But I swear I piled them along the old newspaper stack for recycling! I think...

Anyhoo, I'm just dropping by to say how nice of you and the other boys to come over to Malaysia again this year. Too bad Kevin won't be coming along. Please send him my regards to him, will ya? I hope he still remembers me from the last time I visited your family's Christmas dinner.

It breaks my heart to tell you this, but I won't be going to watch the show. Honestly, I didn't even plan to. I know we had such a meaningful and deep relationship in the past, but what's done is done. We've both moved on. You have such a loving wife and a cute little boy now. And I've found the man of my dreams. Well, he doesn't exactly look as dishy as Hugh Jackman, but he loves me so.

Would you be upset if I didn't show up? Please don't make me feel guilty baby. It seems like eons ago since I was a bopping little teenage girl who [hearts] the Backstreet Boys. I'm a young woman now. Like yours, my music tastes has also evolved. I'm more into Michael Buble, Mika, The Killers and other emo artists nowadays. Don't be mad at me for not buying your new album. Maybe BSB no longer has a place in my heart anymore. But I still remember each word to your song lyrics... I was singing to the entire 'As Long As You Love Me' while I was caught in a traffic jam at Masjid Jamek the other day. My boyfriend nearly choked me to death. He lowered the windows in a desperate attempt to shut me up, but I kept on going. I love you. I really do. But I guess in a more different way now.

So I wish you guys good luck. I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for your show to be a sell-out. How I wish you guys could come much earlier. It's been 5 years too late.