Is it me, or is it hot in here?

Oh Miss Selfridge! You made me lust for this totally unnecessary dress which I probably wouldn't need in my wardrobe, but would totally die to own it anyway. But of course since your designs come all the way from the land of Ukay, the conversion rate is bloody hell high and it breaks my heart that I couldn't afford to have this yummy piece of fabric. You know, I was at your boutique yesterday, happily trying on both colours and falling in love with both! But I had to scramble out after I saw the price tag :(

Over reacting, you say? With my current paying salary I wasn't being even halfway to OTT. Just brutally honest. Can I also be totally honest right now to tell you that your dress made me look like a supermodel who just stepped out from a hip hop video on MTV? I must say, black made me look super skinny and red... What can I possibly say about red? Let's just put it this way... If I put on my devil horns I bet tons of guys would jump into the depths of hell to get me. But of course they'd have to get through Mr. Bun while they're at it. Nyek nyek...
So anyways, could you have a sale anytime soon? I think DNP would have it too if you say so. Slash off at least half the price for this dressie will ya? I'll pucker up and kiss your ass cheeks if you do.

Love ya!