Closing the door

For those few years that we weren't studying together, I did my best to keep in touch and keep our friendship. But more often than not, I get ignored. Well, it happened with one or two friends anyway. Till this day I wonder if I'm wrong to turn a deaf ear to her stories. Does this make me a cold-hearted beast that my friends would fear if they knew? I have my reservations when she tells me stories of how pitiful her life is. But who could blame me for not believing when she confesses of having leukemia? Confessions which were made casually over a chat on MSN. If it were that serious she could've gave me a ring. I see her still happily posting pictures on Friendster and chatting away on MSN, telling me more stories of her failed relationships, enquiring about my relationship, asking me out for tea and more. What's more baffling is that she supposedly has only a short while more to live, (or so she tells me, but not specifically how much longer) but still has a job. No offence but I wouldn't buy the story that a leukemia patient at a terminal stage would have the ability to drive to work and sit in the office working all day. Now I understand why she told me stories of her being pregnant and went for an abortion when we were teenagers, then telling me later that she wasn't pregnant after all. Maybe she just wanted attention. Just like how she wants it now. She probably needs help. But I don't think I'm able to give it. Forgive me. I need a closure and you're not allowed into my life anymore.

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